Breaking up via news release: the translation
The recent divorce of Crispin and VW is big news in the ad community. Leave it to the co-host of American Copywriter, Tug McTighe, to translate the carefully crafted corp-speak news release into the actual conversation that was had between the automaker and admaker:
What VW said:
"Our goal of rapidly increasing our volume in a mature market requires the Volkswagen brand to evolve into a more relevant mainstream choice," Tim Ellis, VP-marketing at Volkswagen of America, said in a statement. "The Volkswagen brand needs to inspire our base of enthusiasts as well as reach out and captivate those in mainstream America. Therefore, we are re-evaluating all areas of our business and after careful considerations have decided to take the necessary steps to ensure we have the right agency partner in place."
Translated:
"We're going to get rid of that freaky, weird shit that Crispin kept coming up with and are going to appeal to the middle-American morons who never understood those crazy-ass campaigns anyway with what they really want: Sheet metal and ads that make sure to spell the dealers' names correctly."
What Crispin said:
"We have been privileged to have had the opportunity to work with Volkswagen for the past four years and are extremely proud of all that we have accomplished together. As a rule, we do not participate in reviews for our current accounts, and this will not be an exception. We wish Volkswagen the absolute best."
Translated:
"Up yours VW."
Advertising,
Writing 


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